To Miller at the End of Kindergarten

With Daddy on your 1st day of kindergarten. You were SO excited!

Miller, I can’t even believe you are finishing kindergarten this week! What an amazing year you’ve had! You LOVE school. You LOVE Mrs. Gornto. I asked you yesterday how you felt about finishing kindergarten this week, and you said, “Well, there’s a best and a worst. The best is summer, of course. The worst is I don’t  wanna ever leave Mrs. Gornto. We’re gonna miss each uver.”

On the 1st day of school with your favorite person!

You are such a special, special little boy. You have the sweetest spirit. You are a friend to all, and you just seem to know how to make other people happy.

Book Character Day :-)

You‘re a talker! You say most of what comes to your mind, and you tell us a lot that your “brain is always sending you things to say.”  I love the way you think. It’s so uniquely YOU. You approach things from a different angle, which we LOVE, and you’re also very aware of your surroundings, even when others don’t realize it—you’re extremely perceptive.

Being a silly boy at your Thanksgiving party!

You’re a social butterfly. When we go to the playground, you come home talking about the new friends you met and asking if we can set up playdates with them. When I asked you the first day of school what was most exciting about kindergarten, you said “MAKING FRIENDS!” You love people!

 100-yr-old on the100th day of school!

You ‘re hilarious. I’ve written down many of the funny things you’ve said (and some of them are just SO not appropriate to share). I know you’ll get a kick one day out of your childhood musings. J  We do (most of the time)!

The day you found Mommy a heart-shaped rock on the playground. Made my day!

You ask so many questions about Jesus. Some of them are WAY DEEP and thoughtful, and even though your questions throw us for a loop sometimes, I love that you’re eager to learn more about Jesus.  Many times you pray when something concerns you or when you’re thankful. I hope you will always go to God in prayer! You won’t always be exactly the same, but God will, and HE LOVES YOU.

During your precious spring program!

Daddy and I feel so incredibly blessed that God entrusted you to us! You are a wonderful combination of enthusiasm and joy and compassion. I pray that you will walk daily with God and keep letting your light shine just as bright as it does right now. Mommy and Daddy love you so much!!!

Mother's Day Tea...You kept putting your arm around me and asking me if I needed anything else to eat or drink. :-)

 

“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” –Matthew 5:16

 

 

 

 

To Maggie, at the End of Kindergarten

My sweet Maggie! I remember the first time I really got to hold you and look at you. You were about two hours old because you had to be taken to the NICU when you were born. Daddy and I were waiting on you in our hospital room, and the nurse brought you in and handed you to me. You looked at me with your beautiful little eyes (just like Daddy’s), and I was in love. I will never be the same.

I can’t believe it’s been 6 ½ years, and you’re graduating from kindergarten! You’re such a beautiful girl, inside and out. So smart and kind and talented and funny. So many things about you I love, but my favorite is your sweet spirit. I love that you are kind to your friends and your brother (most of the time). I love that you put others before yourself. I love that you give me one extra hug every day when I drop you off for school. You’ll never know how much I love that! I love that you’ll still hold my hand. I hope you’ll always hold my hand.

When you were a baby, I used to just rock you and wonder what you would be like as a child. What your voice would sound like, whether you’d like to read like your Daddy (you do!), whether you’d like music like your mommy (you do!), what kinds of things you’d be into. Right now, you like all things art, dolphins and horses, writing songs, and Harry Potter (which  Daddy and I are very sorry about but we know will pass!).

On the way home from school last week, you talked a lot about Jesus and asked if you could pray the prayer to have him come into your heart. You won’t understand this for a long time, but Mommy came inside and just cried because it made me so happy. You’ll have wonderful days in life, and you’ll have hard days when you want to bury your head in a hole, which breaks my heart. But you’ll always have Jesus, and he’ll never leave your side. If you never learn anything else from Mama and Daddy, I want you to learn that. I love to hear you talk about Jesus and how much he loves you, and how much you love him. My prayer is that your relationship with him will grow, that you'll be a disciple that leads many others to him, and that Daddy and I will do our very best to help you.

Six years have flown by so fast. In six more, you’ll nearly be a teenager. In six more, you’ll be graduating from high school. I wish I could slow down time. I wish I could keep you just the way you are right now. But God has big plans for you, I KNOW it, and I can’t keep you little forever!

I hope one day, when you’re “grown” (ha) and think you know everything and you’re smarter than your mama (which I’m sure you will be), you’ll read this and know how much I love you. So much it hurts. So much I’m having to dry off the keyboard while I type this! But for now, I’ll just give you a hug and tell you how proud I am of you and how I'm glad God gave you to us just exactly the way you are. I love you!

Love,
Mommy

 
 

From a Healing Heart

I feel like we are guilty at times of showing others only our best. Because we are scared to show them what’s underneath that. Maybe it’s a hurting heart. Sadness, bitterness, worry…sins and aches of all types. We don’t want people to know that. I don’t, at least. But I’ve had it on my heart for a while to write this down. Maybe so someone could read it, identify with it, be encouraged…come to know my Healer, Protector, and Savior. Or maybe just so I can read it later and be reminded of this season in my life and how God has used it to shape who he wants me to be.

I say we are “guilty” of showing others only our best because I don’t believe that’s real. I think it’s great to let people see the wonderful things God has done in our lives, but I also think there’s a time to be real and let people see how God can make beauty out of things that apart from him, just aren’t beautiful.

These past couple of years, we've had some tragic things happen to people we love. I've been carrying some heavy burdens around--saying I was carrying them to Jesus--but in all reality, I wasn’t. I was taking them to him, and then carrying them around with me everywhere I went. Constantly trying to think of a way to fix things that I just couldn’t possibly fix.

It weighed and weighed on me until I woke up one morning last winter and realized my spirit had been crushed. Utterly and completely crushed. Words really can’t describe how that feels, but I imagine we all know some version of a crushed spirit. It’s like I was walking around with a veil over my eyes that made everything in the world shades darker than I remembered it being. Worrying about the next step...all day, and sometimes all night, until extreme exhaustion set in, making things much worse. I wrote down my prayers every day during the worst of that time period—and looking back—I see repeated pleas to God to replenish me with his joy. With his peace. With a real smile that felt normal. I felt like I had been robbed. Yes, in spite of the wonderful husband, children, and countless blessings God has given me, I felt deeply, deeply sad, and very, very panicked.

I used to pray through tears--lots of them--“God, please fix me!” Or many times, just “Jesus, please”…not even knowing what I was asking for.

Looking back, I realize that God used that time to show me how utterly helpless I am without him. I had said the words before, “I’m lost without you.” Oh, but I hadn’t known the meaning. (And I'm sure there'll be many times later in life when I know the meaning even more.) I‘m a control freak, perfectionist kind of gal. But life dished out so much that it became downright impossible for me to bear. God needed to show me that. Otherwise, why would I go to him?

I don’t want this post to be a bummer! That’s not the point at all. Here’s the point:

In the midst of all that, one thing never changed (and never will): God’s love. He loved me for the broken mess I was. He carried me and continues to carry me through each day. I knew even then, and repeated to myself multiple times a day …”the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6). I still struggle with worry daily. But he gives me the peace, strength, hope, and joy that I could never get from this world. I don’t deserve any of that, but he willingly gives it. All because he loves me.  How awesome is it that he offers that to all of us?

So, I continue to pray for God to daily replenish me and use that struggle for good—to make something beautiful out of it. Knowing that only he can, and knowing that he will.

“But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” (Isaiah 40:31)

 

 

Miller at 4!

Miller turned four on September 8 (I’m way behind on blogging). I can’t believe how time flies! He had his four-year check-up today. He weighs 35 pounds and is 40 inches tall. He had the flu mist and four immunizations and didn’t shed a tear—smiled most of the time, in fact.

We are so blessed to have Miller in our family. He is one of the funniest people I’ve ever been around. He is a sweet, precious, wild, energetic, mischievous, loving, kind, wonderful little boy.

I love…

·        His sweet spirit and huge smile.

·        How he holds up his little pointer finger when he says something he’s excited about.

·        How he gives the biggest and tightest hugs.

·        How he stumbles into our room every morning and says “Good mornin’.”

·        How he is so quick to forgive, always.

·        How he talks, plays, and loves with his WHOLE heart.

·        How he is a friend to everybody.

·        How he says “yes ma’am” and “thank you” and “please” and “I’m sorry” (most of the time). J

·        A million other things!

Miller is such a special, precious child. I can’t believe he’s four, and want to keep him little forever, but we can’t wait to see how God will use his sweet, joyful spirit!

Sweet boy at his doctors' appt. today

Prima Ballerinas (Sigh...)

Happy 5th Birthday, Maggie!

Five years ago, sweet Maggie was born. It’s hard to believe it’s been that long because time flies.

We were thrilled about meeting Maggie, but we didn’t know what to expect. (Does any first-time parent?) She was taken to the NICU for a few minutes after she was born because she was pre-term (“near-term”—36 weeks), but when she was about two hours old, the nurse brought her to the room and let us spend some time alone with her. Words can’t even describe how sweet those moments were.

I love watching Maggie grow. She is turning out to be such a sweet little girl. She has such a special, kind heart. I know God has great things planned for her, and I can’t wait to see His plans unfold.

But for now, I’m thinking back five years ago, to that wonderful day Maggie came into our lives. And saying a prayer of thanksgiving for our little girl.

Happy 5^th birthday, Maggie!

Newborn Maggie

Baby Maggie (6 months old)

One-year-old Maggie

Meeting Miller! (22 months old)

Two years old

Three-year-old Maggie

Four years old

Nearly five years old! (5th birthday party)

Joyful, Joyful!

Miller's 3rd Birthday!

Three years ago yesterday we welcomed our Miller into the family. He is the sweetest, best-natured, most adorable little boy, and we are so blessed to have him. He gives the best hugs and kisses and says the most hilarious things you’ve ever heard.

It’s no surprise that when given choices for his birthday party, he chose a pirate party. We loved getting together with friends and family to celebrate our little fella. Here are some pictures…

Most of the friends at the party...Some of them hadn't gotten there yet, but we were afraid there would be a "shipwreck" with the cupcake stand because the wind was blowing, so we had to sing "Happy Birthday" early.

So happy to have the birthday song sung to him!

One of my favorite Miller smiles

Opening presents...genuine surprise! He thought he only got one birthday present, so he was surprised when more kept coming!

"I could do this every day!"

The cupcake stand Daddy and Mr. Scott built

I made the banner. KIDDING...Jeff made it. He's so crafty...

HAPPY 3RD BIRTHDAY, MILLER! :-)

First Day of School!

The kids and I had our first day of school today, and it went great! Here are some pics of the cuties this morning.



A Post of Pictures

Finally, some pictures! And a lot of them...maybe enough to last until Miller's birthday week-after-next. (Nah...)

Can't believe how grown-y that little girl is looking!

Starting ballet for the year...

Jeff asked her to do a ballet pose.

According to Mags, this is also a ballet pose. :-)

This was two years ago when she first took ballet. Crazy how fast they grow!

Events leading up to this picture: Daddy gets Miller dressed. Mommy decides Miller's pants need to be ironed. Miller puts bucket on his head and calls himself "bucket head." Bucket head chases Maggie around and then poses for a picture.

Our nephew Camden had his 1st birthday, and all the cousins got to play together and celebrate! It's very hard to get a picture of 11 cousins all smiling and looking at the camera. (There is one extra child. He's an only child and was probably stunned and confused!)

Miller loved playing with his cousins!

The birthday boy and his cute little curls!

Not a good picture of Mommy, but this is one of my favorite smiles of Miller's.



Good Night Snack

A tradition that I had growing up was always having a "bedtime snack." I was always a good eater (still am!), and I guess my mom didn't see the harm in my having a little snack just before brushing my teeth and going to bed every night. That tradition has pretty much stuck with me (along with a few extra pounds!). As a result, the kids always want a bedtime snack.

Only...the tradition has morphed into something a little different and pretty hilarious. Instead of asking for a bedtime snack, Maggie asks for a "midnight snack." Miller asks for a "good night snack." They also ask for a "midnight show" or a "good night show" before every nap time and bedtime. It has gotten to the point now where Miller calls breakfast a "wake-up snack" and lunch a "good night snack." Silly kids!

Since we still can't find our camera and posts without pictures tend to get pretty boring, here are a couple of previously unposted pics from the past few weeks.

Maggie's Prayers

I wanted to write down Maggie’s prayers tonight because I don’t want to forget them…
 

“We love you for giving us the things we want and we love you when you give us the things we don’t want.”

“Thank you for making a store where we can shop.”

“Thank you for making our names and showing us how to spell them.”

“Thank you for the fun night that we had.”

“Thank you for the friends you ‘have gaven’ us.”

“Thank you for loving me when I’m bad.” (Broke my heart)

I love that sweet girl’s prayers and the discussions we have at bedtime. (Bedtime is when she chooses to ask deep questions.) I love that she’s getting old enough to really think about things. She’s a thinker like her Mama and Daddy.

She had a hard time falling asleep tonight (took a three-hour afternoon nap), so we talked a while, sang each other every song we know, counted to 100, named all of our cousins, and I finally, in a poor parenting moment, made her a playlist of preschool songs on the ipod to listen to for a few minutes while she gets sleepy. Whew! I surely could fall asleep! J

Chuckles

For the past day, I’ve been writing down some of the things M&M have said that have made me chuckle. Here goes…

Maggie:

“Let me drive the four-wheeler. Miller’s pretty much a bad driver.”

Said during snack time: “Mama, why do you keep eating more cookies?”

Said while playing with Miller, head bowed and all: “Dear Jesus, please help stop this bad day I’m having. Please help Miller stop snatching from me. Amen.”

Miller:

“Mr. Jeff needs to fix the TV.” (He corrected himself. He started off saying “Daddy” and changed it to “Mr. Jeff.”)

“That was the goodest pizza I ever had.”

Said while pushing Maggie around on the ottoman (a favorite activity around here):  “You are getting heavy, Maggie.”

Also…Jeff was awakened in the middle of the night by Miller sitting happy as a clam in the middle of the couch flipping through a book and talking about it. (I was awakened by the subsequent crying when Jeff put Miller back to bed. What a mean Daddy to make him go back to bed instead of reading all night!) Poor kid is so tired now he’s struggling with nap time. Here’s to a good night’s sleep! :-)

Luke 6:31

"Do to others as you would have them do to you."

A simple, clear command. So important for all of us at every age and in every walk of life. And sometimes such a struggle. And very, very applicable to life with my two-year-old and four-year-old right now.

I LOVE having them just two years apart. It is so rewarding to hear them playing and being sweet to each other. Just this morning they were walking down the sidewalk holding hands.

But the BICKERING…argh! Lately, nearly every time one of them has a toy or a book, the other wants it. Sometimes they will ask nicely for it and the other one will refuse to share it. Then a fight ensues. Sometimes they will choose to snatch instead of asking nicely. Then a fight ensues. Sometimes they will share with conditions (“You can play with it for ONE minute”—i.e. one second.) Then the conditions expire and a fight ensues. You get it.

SO, today we memorized Luke 6:31. Do I expect Miller to “get it” right away? Nope. But I surely do want our kids to start understanding this at a young age.

I don’t want to make it sound like life is “so hard” around here or like I don’t enjoy it. I love these children more than I think they could ever understand (maybe one day when they have little ones of their own, or maybe not even then!), and I love staying home with them. I wouldn’t trade this time with them for anything. The bickering is just a struggle. I’m trying to view it as a chance for GROWTH and LEARNING. (Right?)

On a funny note, Maggie told me this morning that Miller was “not obeying the Bible” because he took two books from her. Oh, dear! J